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Kinky Boot

by The Irish Brigade

on Pardon Me for Smiling (2017)

I drove my Sarcen through your garden last night
I kicked your front door down around at midnight
Something's telling me, boy, that your avoiding me
And when I find you, you will run for your tea

I've got a brand new shiny helmet, and a pair of kinky boots
I've got a lovely new flak jacket, a lovely khaki suit
When we go on night patrol, we hold each other's hand
For we are the British Army, and we're here to take your land

My good friend Bertie, he's in the UDR
Searching for weapons he will go near and far
Up around by Cappagh, you'd never find him there
The only gun he'll get there is an Armalite in his ear!

I've got a brand new shiny helmet, and a pair of kinky boots
I've got a lovely new flak jacket, a lovely khaki suit
When we go on night patrol, we hold each other's hand
For we are the British Army, and we're here to take your land

My good friend Trevor, he's in the RUC
But now they've handed him his redundancy
Folks along the border won't be seeing him any more
That Provo sniper will be missing him for sure!

I've got a brand new shiny helmet, and a pair of kinky boots
I've got a lovely new flak jacket, a lovely khaki suit
When we go on night patrol, we hold each other's hand
For we are the British Army, and we're here to take your land

My good friend Nigel, he's in the SAS
He says a change is just as good as arrest
Now they've gone and posted him way down to Crossmaglen
He wishes to blazes, he was back in jail again!

I've got a brand new shiny helmet, and a pair of kinky boots
I've got a lovely new flak jacket, a lovely khaki suit
When we go on night patrol, we hold each other's hand
For we are the British Army, and we're here to take your land

My good friend Sammy, he's in the DUP
An upstanding member, as all the world can see
I said, "Go up to Donegal, if you want to have some fun"
He said, "I'll take a run there, if I have nothing on"

I've got a brand new shiny helmet, and a pair of kinky boots
I've got a lovely new flak jacket, a lovely khaki suit
When we go on night patrol, we hold each other's hand
For we are the British Army, and we're here to take your land

My good friend Johnny,he's left the UDA
He said it'll fair the LDF anyday
Calling all his friends,"Get ready for a fight"
He's made an appointment to meet Billy Wright

I've got a brand new shiny helmet, and a pair of kinky boots
I've got a lovely new flak jacket, a lovely khaki suit
When we go on night patrol, we hold each other's hand
For we are the British Army, and we're here to take your land