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The Borgia Family

by Horrible Histories

on The Woman Who Poisoned 600 Men with Her Makeup (2024)

[THE BORGIAS]
Lucrezia, Giovanni,
Gioffre and Cesare
Italian barmy army,
The Borgia Family
Our daddy was Rodrigo

[RODRIGO BORGIA]
I had a monstrous ego

[THE BORGIAS]
Where he makes trouble we go
The Borgia Family

[RODRIGO BORGIA]
Our tale begins Renaissance Spain,
Its leaders were a shower
So I run out of patience
So began in my quest for power
I splashed my cash to all the papal cardinals in hope
That they'd be bought,
They were in short
And I became the Pope
More power than I oughta

[THE BORGIAS]
Blood's thicker than water

[RODRIGO BORGIA]
Appoint my sons and daughter

[THE BORGIAS]
To run a dynasty

[CESARE BORGIA]
With daddy as the Pope I could do as I pleased, was ace
I'd kill a man who dared to
Like, invade my personal space

[RODRIGO BORGIA]
I found a husband for Lucrezia
Rich Giovanni Sforza, do you love him?

[LUCREZIA BORGIA]
Yes of course but love is power and money more so

[THE BORGIAS]
Now married to the Sforza's
This opens up new doorsas
They world bows down before us
The Borgia/Sforza family

[RODRIGO BORGIA]
Yes, and while we're at it we will marry son Gioffre
Aged twelve but so what soon will be
The Borgia/Sforza and the Naples family

When the Sforza family
Eventually bores ya
With just annul the marriage
If he refuses to divorce ya

[LUCREZIA BORGIA]
Don't I get a say?

[RODRIGO BORGIA]
Don't fret, for you another man I'll get
Alfonzo of Aragon

[LUCREZIA BORGIA]
I like him, this could go on and on!

[CESARE BORGIA]
You like him, I've gone off him
His pretty face makes me wince

[LUCREZIA BORGIA]
You killed him!

[CESARE BORGIA]
Yeah I'm the model for
Machiavelli's Prince

[RODRIGO BORGIA]
Giovanni run the army but Cesare said

[CESARE BORGIA]
"No way! I'll kill you if you cross me
I might kill you anyway"
I am the mostest powerfulest, evilest of all
As long as dad's alive
There's not a single chance I'll fall

[RODRIGO dies.]

[CESARE BORGIA]
Aw, no

[THE BORGIAS]
We suddenly lost status
It seemes the whole world hate us
They excommunicate us
The Borgia Family
R.I.P.