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Poo Finger

by Billy Lewis

on Log (2023)

[Intro - Billy]

Billy Lewis here,
back again,
ready to bounce a remix off the back of your brain,

[Verse 1 - Billy]

Yes sir, yes sir,
that's how I roll,
when I've got my tongue in your mouth,
I've got my fingers in your hole,

I don't care if you're skinny,
and I don't care if you're fat,
I'll bend you over my bed,
and turn that dress into a hat,

So slide to the left,
and slide to the right,
and kiss bye-bye to your fanny being tight,

Now prepare yourself for the ride of your life.
I've shagged my way from Glesga,
all the way to Fife,
I love talking about shaggin' man,
nothing else matters,
leaving a bird lying there,
fanny hanging in tatters,

[Verse 2 - Billy and Girl character]

[Girl]
Hiya Billy,
what's the script,

[Billy]
Your pants are getting dropped,
and your arse is gettin' dipped,

[Girl]
Do you know that my boyfriend's got a pecker?

[Billy]
Well I'm the Black Decker,
the fuckin' fanny wrecker,
I'm a better ride than you would get at M&D's,
if you want me to prove it just get on your fucking knees,

[Girl]
Teeheehee Billy you're so funny,

[Billy]
The best thing about this ride is you don't need any money,

[Hook]

So throw your hands up in the air,
remove your bra and underwear,
scream out loud like you don't care,
I don't want any clothes on,
I want you bare,

[Verse 3 - Billy and Girl character]

[Girl]
Billy your fly's down,
I'm sorry for peepin',

[Billy]
The cage is open but the beast is sleeping,
you don't need to apologise just give it a feel,

[Girl]
Aye right man,
is that thing real?

[Billy]
Sure is darling 100% beef,
now get down on your knees and I'll put it inbetween your teeth,

[Girl]
Aye right man you must be kiddin'

[Billy]
no im no
get down'nya knees ya fuckin midden

[Girl]
calm down darling
theres no need to shout

[Billy]
well get on yor back so i can pound your trout

[Girl]
i swear to god billy you better stop actin like a prick

[Billy]
shout yer fookin moof and suck ma fuckin dick

i swear te god baby, i promise on wont hurt ye
stop actin shy, we all know yor a dirty

[Girl]
naw billy, ya need to buy me flowers first

[Billy]
why doont ya bend down nd'ye cunt'll get burst

[Girl]
uhhuh billy, im goon'ta cum

[Billy]
thers an asshole and here comes the thumb

[Girl]
uh baby, thats too sore

[Billy]
i bigged up'ma thumb in yor back doore
a big dirty thumb is what yor needin

[Girl]
ah baby, i think ma arseholes bleedin

[Billy]
aw yuck
outcomes the thumb
ejecto thumb
from your bum
aw wit man ma thumbs all stinky

[Girl]
really baby? thats quite kinky

[Billy]
is it fuck, ya fuckin minger
y'notthaone sittin wi a brown finger

[Girl]
sorry baby let me suck your dick

[Billy]
naaw fuck that man i feel sick
i swear te god im about to spew

[Girl]
aw calm down
its only a bit of poo

[Billy]
only a bit of poo?
its fuckin rank
i should make you lick that off you skank

[Girl]
dont billy, you'll make me spew

[Billy]
your that one that said 'its just poo'
no wit hen get yourself te fuck
whil am in the toilet, cleanin off this muck

[Girl]
billy you've gone pure chalk white

[Billy]
ne wonder imsittinmethumb covered in shite

[Girl]
it was your idea
to put it in

[Billy]
did i ask your opinion ya fuckin bin
so just get oot
ya fuckin minger
ill set him salt with a jobby covered pringer

its an antique story
so there ya go
thats the night billy visited a chucklito